psa: if you screenshot dunk my users and talk shit about my instance and dont even bother to like, i dont know, talk to me or report whatever you're hopped up about i might not be inclined to remain federated with you :blobcatglaredrink:

anyway please dont screenshot dunk until, at the very least, you have exhausted several other options. preferably not at all.

ok full disclosure: it WAS reported but the user in question deleted so it didn't show up how i expected and i didnt notice it at first

but the screenshot dunk lives on and people are being shitty about it in that thread so yeah idk. maybe like. thats why this kind of thing is bad and dont do it

we're never going to be safe if we treat each other and other admins like they're twitter jack. we have to solve problems with communication and setting boundaries.

what hapsburger said was fucked up and racist and she is absolutely not welcome back ever, and if i see her on the fedi again i'll be informing her new admin of her history with a recommendation to show her the door.

as such, the value of rebroadcasting her vile, racist diatribe to even more eyeballs is questionable enough, never mind the fucking open season on me and my instance that resulted in treating this situation like i'm, well, twitter jack

i'm being accused of... a lot of things for being displeased with being shat on by a bunch of people with an axe to grind with whom i have made repeated efforts to come to an understanding with.

i am happy to, and assuredly will continue to, address concerns people have, but i can't do anything about people who want to paint me as a villain no matter what i do. everyone has a Take about how im racist, authoritarian, not authoritarian enough, didn't do enough precog, whatever.

ultimately,i take the long view and remain consistent on my core value that the fedi needs to be better than corporate social media and we need to talk out our problems and boundaries

like i pretty much every day bang on in mastodev about how reports need to come in-app. i make repeated and frequent posts asking people to come to me and make reports about issues, and to at me if its urgent. i am involved in several and even run one of my own communication hubs for fedi admins to make sure that info Really Bad Shit and Bad Actors gets out FAST

i dont know what else i can do to be a more active admin, and i find out, i'm going to do it, because i love the fedi and i love witches

so yes. i do and i will take it personally. im not upset that the dunk was "not respectable uwu~"im upset at the utter lack of trust and faith in me, and the fedi

Enter discipleship

im sorry that this ended not-so-amicably with several people, but i cannot do anything about people not willing to work with me, respect my boundaries, reciprocate trust, or share a vision of a fediverse that isn't Corporate SNS Nightmare Part 2. 😔

@anna I think ur a gr8 admin. You actually listen to your user base. Whoever dunked you is probably a piss baby who couldn't have it their way >.>

@selina i dont even know what they wanted. to make a lot of people read a racist post? like it wasnt in good faith, it was an excuse to shittalk me/the coven.

@anna ooooo so THATS what it was. I was thinking completely different until I finally read it all. Wow this is really wack. Why shit talk the coven and join it? What did they gain?? That's too much energy and time tbh

@selina its because we're all poisoned by corporate social media and think escalating shit to ridiculous levels is how you solve problems

@anna anna. come on. how do you expect it to look when you pretty consistently get into arguments with the very tiny amount of not white people on fedi and portray them as being unreasonable, uncivil, or unwilling to listen to your very reasonable opinions? how does it look from the outside, anna? nobody i follow complains about being called racist as much as you do. if everyone says it smells like shit consider checking your shoes.

@anna please don't respond to this with some witty overthought bullshit! instead, please take some time and consider that you could in fact be in the wrong about what racism looks like, not the qpoc trying to tell you what's wrong.

@peach @anna i know nothing about any of this, but here is some observation from an outsider: directing someone *how* to respond in an argument means you need to cool down and rethink your goals for the conversation. You can't control how others react and you shouldn't try to. Even if you think they're wrong. K shooting off into space now this never happened baiiiii

@amina an excellent thing to do if you dont know anything about a situation is to simply not respond at all

@peach sorry but @amina is absolutely right that you would have replied with that bullshit no matter what i said. im happy to talk to you if you want to talk, but you're more interested in setting traps and trying to prove that i'm some awful racist monster or whatever and it's obvious to me and it's even obvious to someone who doesn't see the whole situation.

@anna @amina im really not, no. i dont have a lot to say. all i did was ask that you not reply with some witty shit and take what i said seriously, because i've been around for long enough to know that when a situation revs up it gets snarky and i dont have time or energy for that

@anna @amina im not trying to prove youre a monster or whatever anna i barely log on here anymore if you think im trying to bust out a dunk or something you're entirely off the mark.

@peach @amina like i didnt reply with ~witty shit~ i addressed what you said. its clear you were going to pull that no matter how well thought out my response was but i gave you a chance anyway

@peach Wow. I'm really sorry you're so upset. If you don't like my comment, please mute me.

@peach ah yes that thing that happens all the time except it doesnt

like its the same people from last time

last time i listened to their concerns and ended up taking them to heart and made amends with jovan. im very happy to be friends with him/them again and that is "reward" enough, but when it comes to the people involved here they've been shittalking me/witches relentlessly ever since.

i even like, told one of the people mad that we made up but she left it on read kept relentlessly shittalking anyway. there is nothing i can do to redeem myself in their eyes, so we are going our separate ways.

@peach alright we dont need to follow each other anymore then if you're going to pull this shit

@anna I'm totally out of the loop, but for what it's worth, I think you're doing a great job. I think your passion in creating a safe space shows in your work, and that should be worth more to people. I guess they forget you're a person too. /shrug

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