possibly the fifth most frustrating thing about the things the CIA admits to is that if they were conspiracy theories many of them would be by far the funniest conspiracy theories ever

like how fucked up is it that "the US government tried to pass off political assassinations as vampire attacks" isn't something I'm allowed to giggle about because they actually did it

@sj5 i mean yeah it's objectively hilarious but yk actual people were murdered i have to at least take it a little seriously

@oooh_scary they recently switched to werewolf attacks, after receiving input from consultant/vampire expert Herschel Walker

@hina_hanta honestly given that the things they admit to are already pretty out there the things they don't admit are probably on those lines

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