Enter discipleship

i bought a witchcraft book that was written in the 90s and oh man it does NOT disappoint

@anna this book also has several extended segments about how drugs and alcohol are bad and how you shouldn't do them

@enderwoman sad that they missed a spelling error -- "boogies" should be "bougies"

@enderwoman @anna I’ll wait it out till sky-spirits law and order svu tbh.

@enderwoman "don't forget to use your ignore button" is at least good advice

picture description:

it's a book page with a spell to chase trolls away:

"Mercury and Cyber Space
stamp your feet and start the chase
boogies of the net be gone
beware my magick CD rom
I cleanse, I clear, I scare away
don't come back another day!"

and underneath it says "don't forget to use your ignore button"

it's a book by "Silver Ravenwolf"

@enderwoman this is AWESOME! searching on the text you posted, i found it on the internet OMG: coven-of-midnight.wikidot.com/

@enderwoman holy shit what book is this I need it

it’ll be perfect next to realms of the earth angels

@enderwoman For science—err, magical reasons—I need to know what the Sky-Spirits Law and Order Spell does. And also what it says. :blobcatpeek:

@EveHasWords here's some extra text that's in the book but not on that site... idek what to say about all this....

@enderwoman holy shit abbreviating internet as 'Net is such a goddamn power move

@Absolutely_Blakely everything about this is such a power move.... if someone said "beware my magick cd rom" to me irl i would be completely owned

@oneoddfrog @enderwoman Especially when Mercury and Cyber Space are in retrograde

@enderwoman "Law and Order Spell?" Is Silver Ravenwolf a cop witch?

@leila she's an idiot, so, like, same thing p much... ther'es a pic of it somewhere in the replies but basically it's a spell for "helping your case" if you are involved in anything wrt the legal system

@enderwoman Ah yes the time honoured Wiccan tradition of just copying Christian bullshit and changing as few words as possible

@witchfynder_finder what kills me about this is that this author apparently HATES christians and is constantly complaining about them and calling their religion fake

@enderwoman Oh, of course. You gotta have the cognitive dissonance, it's a key component of this brand of woo. =P

@Metrikoni the instructions literally just say to imagine your favorite animal protecting you/your house... i can't tell if i love or hate that

@enderwoman oh okay easy enoug-WAIT a minute!

Honestly this is an amazing grimoire and I congratulate you on your acquisition.

@Metrikoni it's extremely hilarious....... the cover art is bomb as hell though. it's called teen witch by silver ravenwolf if you want to look it up

@enderwoman Oh heck yeah. I know what I'm doing tomorrow~

@enderwoman This book and its tie-in portable altar were bought for me when I was in 5th grade because they were the only witchy things marketed at kids in Borders... 😂 and my mom knew I was smart enough to just take it as inspo/more grist for the mill lol

@enderwoman I still have the quartz crystal and god/goddess and spiral divination coins that were packaged with it mixed in with my stuff somewhere. The fancy little bell and pentagram pendant had been stolen out of my copy and I was so mad when I opened it, but now I hope whoever took them got good use from them!

(The altar itself and the accompanying book are terrible and flimsy.)

@enderwoman all of her books are like this, please check out the ones for adults there’s so much

@enderwoman Yes! I just chanted it really loud in my living room and birbsite closed almost without conscious action.

@susannah holy shit.... i can't believe i doubted miss ravenwolf and all her wisdom

@enderwoman That's a damn handy spell. I need to buy some candles, stat.

@xmanmonk oh no, i was referencing the poem from the book. i fucking wish there was a cd though

@enderwoman I'm going to be hiding this in hidden html and css elements in every website I make from here on out 💙

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